Christmas sometimes depresses the fuck out of Goddess!!!

I know I have to put most off this shit in the proper light, but MAN! What I wouldn't give to enjoy a pleasant surprise every once in a while. Christmas has always been one of those holidays when I so look forward to that special day of food, family, fun, and surprises. I am a giver and i truly look forward to those special occasion when i am actually given something. well..... Perhaps my heart is broken and it was my own son who faced the responsibility of handing out broken hearts today. He has been working himself into a frothy mess trying to get his ass to BIG LOTS without me to buy a couple of items of interest. I was excited as most children are thinking i was going to get a cute little something my son really wanted to give me to show me how much he loved me and was into the christmas spirit. he came back with a hand-buzzer and a tube of green and orange Goop! not his fault. i have to lower my expectations of being treated in a special way the way i WANT to be treated. Goddess knows she set herself up for that but you know what i always say......it is a pain in the ass to suffer from an incurable case of HOPE. *claps hands* "that's it kids! Pity party is over. nothin' to see here!" Goddess.
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