was i wrong to decide to have an only child?

Milo: mom? Goddess: huh? Milo: i got a question for you. Goddess: (mutters under her breath) i guess i can't say no. yeah go ahead Milo: if you had the choice, would you be a vampire or a werewolf? Goddess: i guess i would pick the werewolf Milo: (walks away dejected. only had a philosophical rant to share if i had answered to the former) Milo: (pokes head back in doorway) that's okay, because you don't have to die. vampires have to be dead for like a whole day. Goddess: (smiles) god i wish this kid had siblings. Goddess
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Why listen to me? I'm just your mother.....

I sat and watched him all night, eating like a puppy who has just discovered a new food. I can't count how many times I gave him "the look". He kept on putting the food in his mouth. When the food is good, sometimes it is hard to stop. Ice cream, cookies, cake , pie He reminded me of the kid from that Charlie and the chocolate factory, you know the one who got stuck in the Chocolate River tube because he was so fat? yeah. that kid was MY kid on Christmas. He rolled around on the floor like a drunken midget and finally found his way to bed (he camped with me because i knew what was coming but decided that i didn't want a repeat of the Jimi Hendrix episode) So he blew chunks around 1am. all i have to say is yuck, yuck, yuck and double yuck.*sigh* His uncle and i did some direction to help him clean up. i had to stay clear of the bathroom for at least 15 minutes because of the smell. *sigh* I have found that you can only nag so much then you just have to wait and see and hope that they learn. Let's just pray he did... Goddess
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Goddess Rambles about Charter Schools

i do see some successes in the charter schools in my area. there are populations that have been painfully under-served. in my case, Black students... yes i know there are many other students who fall into this niche, but i will only talk about what i know. the goal in the school was to give everyone a chance at a quality college-prep educational opportunity. the downside is the proposal was fought like it was the plague. we had a school, the school was empty. we were not shuffling kids about, we just wanted a place for OUR kids... and we take everyone but hear me out. We had to go grassroots to lift enrollment. we pushed in our churches and through our families and we now have to turn children away. our schools are some of the highest in the state of CA at least if not in the nation for charter schools. now that the schools are doing well, other want to sign up. i was on the waiting list for at least 3 years before my son was admitted. if we could open another school, we would be able to increase enrollment. our high and middle school are on a campus that has the ability to house roughly 2000 students, we have half that. it is almost as if we are being set up to fail because we are successful. there are other schools that have closed down. why not take them over? some points that frighten people. 1. non-union teachers 2. unconventional methods used to educate (sure they don't fit the norm, but they work for certain students and we have studies to back that up) 3. makes other schools in the district look bad (my solution to that is for the regular public schools to step up and make the changes necessary for success for ALL of their students) because a great deal of this is from the perspective of a parent of a gifted child in a public school where there was no GATE program, no instinct from teachers so overwhelmed with extremely high student numbers and lack of funding to manage their classrooms effectively (i rarely fault the educators and i don't fault them in this case either) , I felt i had no choice but to step out of the neighborhood school to help my child succeed. His teacher suggested in the 4th grade that i pull him and try to get him in charter. it is a tough call for administrators, educators, parents, and in many cases even the students. i truly believe that charter schools can be the catalyst for change in the educational system of America.
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Shut the Hell Up! It's Christmas Dammit!

There are a great many things i would like to clear out this Christmas season.... Nitpicky Grammar Nazis Jealous Lovers Whining Children Weak Drinks Want for Necessities can we put all that mess in a brown paper bag and set it afire for Christmas? the kids will be thrilled to see FIRE and the adults will be too busy putting marshmallows on sticks for the kids to roast to talk about anything but Christmas cheer. it's too damned close to Christmas to act like fools, be cheap, be without, and run around correcting folks grammar....Now if anyone wants to send a gift my way, i am sure to find some unfortunate folks in my side of the world to make happy during this holiday season of spending TIME and not necessarily MONEY on family members. Goddess
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Lose it like you're getting paid to do it!

I lose it sometimes, and I am proud.
That is not to say that I lose it for the sake of satisfaction of watching little children cower at my feet cringing at the very vibration of my soprano holler...


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I have come to realize that in order to make any attempt at raising well balanced, well rounded, self starting children who will be the adults helping you in and out of bed and on and off the bedpans in your old age, you gotta let them see your human side.
It is okay to lose your cool but you have to set the framework up for how you lose it and make sure your children are comfortable with the process.

I used to yell a great deal. Then, one day, I saw my precious child draw back at my noise level. At that point, I decided that I would stop yelling but I would not give up my release of getting angry and losing it from time to time. I think it is perfectly okay for children to see their parents half cocked and looking a bit crazy. Adds to the flavor of the food at dinnertime.

I had a friend in grade school who had parents that would crack me up when they got angry.Her mom would chew her tongue while scolding her.

Try it. I know you want to... :)

Her stepfather would point at her with his middle finger when he was scolding. It was extra hilarious to watch them both scolding her at the same time.

ah... childhood...

I am thankful to be growing up alongside a young man who sometimes loses it himself. When he has his moments, we can talk about it and how he feels because he knows that I understand because I have been there and he has been witness; willing and unwilling.


So my advice is to never be afraid to lose your cool in front of your children from time to time...

They will respect you for it.
And you will gain respect in a relationship that at times can make you want to flip your lid.


Goddess

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